Ramblings of a Sappy Mother

You know you find out that you are pregnant and you envision this wonderful new little human being. You think about what she will look like, whether she will look like your husband or you, what color will her hair be. You wait for that first little flutter in your belly that really verifies that there is a life within you. Pregnancy is a wonderful and beautiful thing. Then when you find out that there may be a problem, your whole world changes. You wait anxiously on the next kick, you spend more time with the doctors than you do with your husband, you spend countless sleepless nights playing the absolutely horrible "what if" game. Pregnancy is no longer a fun experience. This is a horrible feeling. I am sadly not alone in this experience. It may sound very corny, but I will risk saying it anyway. God has a plan for you before you are even a light in your parents eyes, and nothing is going to change that. I was, for what reason I do not know, watching Special Delivery(a show on Discover Health Channel about high risk pregnancies and newborns with complications) and it was then that I realized that my life could be a million times worse and I need to thank God for every single moment I have with my girls. My pregnancy with Alexis was absolutely awful. I was a nervous wreck, I never stopped crying, I never stopped worrying. All I ever thought about was what would I do if she wasn't OK. Then when she was born early I have never been so terrified in my life. The very worst moment in my very short life was the moment the doctor cheerfully said "Its a girl!" and I waited and waited and didn't hear a sound. Not one little cry from my beautiful new daughter. I thought that my world had ended, I honestly think that I went into shock. About four minutes later I experienced on of the best moments of my life. Our little girl responded to the emergency treatments and let out the sweetest most beautiful cry ever cried. I knew then that everything that I had went through was worth it ten times over. Besides some small complications associated with her being premature, Alexis is an absolutely beautiful perfectly healthy little girl. The point of all of these ramblings are that I have always been thankful for my girls, but some of the horrible pregnancies end up in tragedy, now I realize how good I have it and how thankful I am every second of every day for my two little girls. Sometimes you have to cry for somebody elses tragedies to appreciate your own blessings.